Missing the Mark

Well, the best of intentions and all that aside, I was woefully distracted today. I had plans to create music, I envisioned what I wanted to create last night, I set aside time today, but I allowed other tasks to gain urgency. I got a great deal accomplished over the course of the day. All of it consisted of tasks I wanted to complete or commitments I wanted to keep. But I let them take precedence over the creative efforts I intentionally prioritized.

So, perhaps I tried to pack too much into a day and underestimated how long some things would take. Maybe something inside me was procrastinating out of laziness or fear. Actually, my challenge today was the number of things ~J would recommend placing in the "Urgent and Unimportant" quadrant. I minimize the things that are really important to me in order to take care of the things that are important to other people. Because I don't want to face the fear that, deep down, I'm selfish. So I deny the world the things that only I can create. Kind of silly when I put it that way, actually.

At the end of the day, I look in the mirror, I forgive myself, and I acknowledge that I have tomorrow. Then I realize the true gentleness and blessedness of "I recommit."